Love In Time Of Apocalypse
by Watson
Summary: A group of short stories and or drabbles centered around L4D2, mostly around the relationship between Nick and Ellis. Updated when ever I get ideas: and Rated T for language, mild violent references, and adult situations.
1. A Moment

Nobody was sure exactly what brought it on. They assumed it was a callous joke too far after the heat of battle with the horde. What the joke was about or whom it was about didn't really matter as the world slowed to a crawl and Ellis's fist smashed across Nick's smirking face. It was a shock to everyone, especially Ellis. He watched with wide eyes as Nick stumbled backwards to the wall, the gambler clearly trying to get his bearings back together. Rochelle ran to Nick and Coach took Ellis's arm but the kid wasn't responding. He was focused on Nick who was leaning against the wall, the gambler bringing the back of his hand to his lip. When Nick pulled away his hand even Ellis could see the blood. He had actually cause Nick to bleed, on purpose. Ellis began to shake slightly.

Nick looked up and the hillbilly and the gambler exchanged looks. Ellis wasn't sure exactly was going through Nick's mind but he was sure it couldn't be good. Ellis's throat was parched as he swallowed, hard. "Nick…man…" Ellis stuttered. He couldn't think of anything good to say. The gambler just kept looking at him with an unreadable look. The silence between them caused Ellis to want to scream. "I'm sorry!" he blurted out finally. "I'm sorry Nick!"

The gambler looked at him for a minute more, as if studying him before moving. "Rochelle," Nick said, interrupting his silence but not removing his eyes from Ellis, "There any water in that med pack? I feel like washing my mouth out."

…

Ellis avoided Nick for the rest of the night and for once the safe room was quiet. Rochelle and Coach attempted to fill the gap with talk about various things but it wasn't the same. It was rather unnerving as the mood was tense. It took a while for Ellis to fall asleep, his guilty conscious keeping him awake until he finally couldn't take one more minute of not being able to sleep. Nick took first shift to play look out. He kept a shot gun in hand and looked out between the planks that covered the windows. It was hard to see the horde but he could hear the shuffling. He hated look out that is why he always asked for it first. He didn't jump as Rochelle moved to stand with him, they just stood in silence looking out the window.

"Thank you," Rochelle said.

"For what?"

"For not hitting Ellis."

Nick shrugged effortlessly. "It was nothing, really not worth it." He could feel Rochelle's eyes shift to looking at him.

"Funny, I keep thinking if it had been any other time, any other place, or any other person, you might have actually done something. You would have pounded him into the ground."

"Yeah, I guess so," Nick answered with a smirk. Before all of this that probably would have been his answer. It was the circle of survival, attack when you are. It's what had gotten him through life thus far. His smirk grew as Rochelle kissed his cheek.

"Again, thank you."

Well it had been a while since he had gotten a kiss from a pretty lady. Of course there was that cross dresser in Los Vegas. But it was nice to have a female presence in the group, a female to balance out all the testosterone.

Nick glanced over at Ellis who was sleeping as far away as possible. Once and a while the boy would twitch slightly, clearly not having a good dream. Nick rolled his eyes as he watched Ellis whimper and twitch. Without thinking the gambler removed his jacket and lay it over the boy's sleeping form. Ellis twitched again.

"I'm sorry Nick," Ellis muttered.

Nick ruffled the kid's hair a bit, smirking just a bit. "I know."


	2. Amen

The sound of crunching bone was fairly loud. Just the sound alone was enough but to add insult to injury Nick could have sworn he heard the thing chuckling. The fucking ass zombie was laughing at him as it ripped him apart. Now that was just cruel and unusual. If only he had a pipe bomb right at that moment he'd shove it down the fucker's face. But of course he didn't and even if he did he didn't have the strength, he was just numb all over. He couldn't stop the slight shaking, not out of fear but out of cold. When had it got so damn cold in the south? All sound became muffled as Nick wished he cloud close his eyes. Then again he had never gotten a clean look at a hunter in kill mode before. For a moment he could almost think that this thing was just a mugger looking for drug money. For some reason that idea was easier to take, like the world wasn't infested by the horde and this was just another accident of regular life.

There was a muffled boom sound as the hunter's head exploded. Nick flinched only slightly as pieces of skull, brain matter, and other various bits rained down on his face. He could taste the bitter metallic taste on his tongue and he involuntarily swallowed pieces of infected. Damn it, he hoped that this wasn't going to mean that he was infected now as well like eating tainted sushi. Suddenly his torso was being lifted into the air and Nick was being dragged across the muddy ground. Still unable to close his eyes he was forced to watch the horde as the rushed towards him and whatever was dragging him along. They were like a tidal wave of death approaching ready to crash on him and pull him under. But the rush suddenly disappeared as the safe door closed and the image disappeared.

Of course this was about the point that Nick's vision began to blur and everything became moving blobs. He could hear talking, or was it shouting? He couldn't be sure it was so muffled, kind of like the sobbing of a witch. Finally the world stopped moving and Nick felt the cold of concrete against his back. Something warm held his cheek, his head turned towards it. The fog dissipated and Nick was glad it was Ellis's bright shining face that came into view.

"Nick? Can ya' talk buddy?" the kid asked worriedly, his voice clearing away the shit in the conman's ears.

Through the pain Nick put on a small smirk. "I saved your ass again farm boy."

Ellis grinned that pretty little white boy grin of his. Someone could have called it innocent if it weren't for the blood spatters on the kids face. "You did Nick," he said almost cheerfully. "I don't know what it is about those damn infected shits but they keep gunnin' for me!"

"It's because you look to damn innocent," Nick muttered shaking his head. "You're like little freakin' little red ridding hood out there!"

"Are ya callin' me a girl Nick?"

"So what if I am, you going to try to fight the man that just saved your ass?"

Ellis actually smiled more and laughed. "Well maybe not right now but some day Nick, one of these days…"

Nick laughed. "Your welcome to try farm boy but don't go thinking that I'll go easy on you!" Deep inside Nick was strangely proud of the kid. Of course Nick was impressed that Ellis had managed to make it this far but in some ways Nick always knew he would. The kid was strong after all, plus the kid had Nick looking out for him. Of course then the gambler happened to look over Ellis's shoulder and could see the real shit they were in. Coach was a little more stoic but Rochelle was a big give away. She kept looking at him with a pitiful look, trying to smile sadly as she looked away. They both kept looking down at Nick's lower body. Nick knew he shouldn't look, so he only glanced down for a second. That was enough to make him very nauseous. "Oh shit," he breathed.

Ellis caught on instantly. "Hey it's okay," the farm boy said rather forcefully. "You're going to be okay Nick."

Rochelle laid a hand on Ellis's shoulder. "Ellis, sweetheart…"

The kid shook his head hard, showing that anything Ro had to say was going to be denied with great conviction. "It's just a scratch…"

Nick raised an eyebrow, daring the kid to continue.

"Okay so it's not a scratch but you're alive and we've got a med pack so I'll just bandage you..."

"Overalls," Nick said looking at the younger man, "stop."

"I got a med pack right here," the boy answered pulling the med kit from off his shoulder. He began to pull out the bandages. "You're goin' to be fine Nick, I promise."

Nick could see Rochelle and Coach looking as if they wanted to do something but didn't have the heart. Of course it was the asshole that had to do all the shitty stuff. Nick sighed deeply. "Ellis," Nick said again trying to get Ellis's attention but the kid didn't look up. Nick hissed as the kid brushed over the gaping wound. "dickhead, just stop!"

Ellis still didn't look up. He looked something like those mindless drones outside, focused on one thing.

Nick didn't want to get angry but the situation had just hit boiling. He couldn't take it any more and he grabbed Ellis's face with both hands and forced the younger man to look him in the eye. "I said stop!" he growled.

Ellis just looked at him with those big innocent doe eyes. "We need to stop the bleedin' Nick," he said as if Nick was the stupid one.

Nick sighed, feeling the rage wanting to bubble up and over flow like the blood from his body. "What are you trying to do farm boy?" he asked, keeping his green eyes focused on blue.

"I'm tryin' to save your life Nick."

Nick couldn't tell if Ellis really was that stupid or just didn't want to face reality.

"Ellis," he said, still keeping steady eye contact, "don't waste the bandages, it's not worth it."

"Of course it is Nick," Ellis said with a small smile.

Nick couldn't take it any more. "Ellis!" the gambling man cried gripping the boy's face with more force. "The leg is gone! My freakin leg is gone! I'm a fucking one legged gimp! No amount of bandages is going to make up for the fact that I have no fucking leg!"

Ellis frowned deeply. Nick could see the understanding in those blue eyes but not the acceptance. "I need to stop the bleedin'," he repeated.

"And then what farm boy? Then what are you going to do, grow me a new leg?! You gonna give me one of yours? I'm going to need another leg from somewhere because even a dumb southern fuck like you has to know that it takes two legs to run and to avoid zombies who want to rip what's left of me apart!" It was all a bit cruel and Nick could see the anger in the face of the other two. It wasn't like they were willing to say it. They just left it up to the asshole, to Nick the dick who says what everyone wants to say but has the heart in which to stop themselves from saying it. Nick kept his focus on the face he held in his hands, trying to force Ellis into reality. "What are you planning to do Ellis? Carry me like one of those 'back humpers'?" Nick thought back to the chuckling hunter and laughed bitterly. He closed his eyes and his hands fall away from Ellis's face.

"So ya just goin' give up?"

Nick could hear the tears in the kid's voice even before he opened his eyes. Leave it to Ellis to be the one to break his heart with those baby blue eyes.

"You said you weren't gonna die out here," Ellis said, voice wavering as he focused on Nick's face. The tears were beginning to dribble just a little.

"Lady Luck dealt me a shit hand," Nick answered. "She likes to drop the atomic bomb while the shit hits the fan. There's nothing anyone can really do about it." He could see more tears fall and he tried the trade mark smirk. "I really am surprised I lasted this long," he said forcing the chuckle from his mouth. "I was betting on dying way before now." Maybe that would have been better, then maybe he wouldn't have had any hope of actually living nor would he have become so attached to these people.

Ellis said nothing but Nick could see that young lip quivering. Nick didn't even flinch as Ellis buried his quivering lips as well as the rest of that pretty face into his neck. Ellis's hands held on to his jacket tightly, knuckles nearly turning as white as the fabric use to be. "We were so close, Nick," the kid whispered. "It's not fair."

"Yeah, it's not," Nick answered, rather gently. "But who better to die then the guy who insults Gibbs right? Maybe that's what finally got me, who knew god was a Gibbs fan to."

Ellis didn't answer.

Nick could feel the skin of his neck becoming damp and he was feeling an emotion he hadn't dealt with in a while, guilt. He actually had guilt for dying and for making Ellis cry. It so would have been easier to die earlier on. Nick looked over at Coach, seeing the man's tough demeanor breaking with each tear. "I'm not really a praying man," he said, guilt creeping into his speech. "I don't know if I believe there is a God anymore but do you think God can forgive an asshole?"

"God is always forgiving." Coach swallowed and smiled weakly. It wasn't very convincing.

Nick nodded anyway. He couldn't blame the big guy for having doubts that he himself had always had. What Nick couldn't believe was that he was accepting this so easily. Maybe it was the blood loss. Ellis sniffled and Nick took the kid's face into his hands once again, this time gently without the use of any force. Ellis's eyes wouldn't meet his but Nick smiled, brushing away tears with his thumbs. "Ellis, would you look at me for a minute. Just listen to a dying man's wishes please."

Ellis raised his eyes, blurred by the tears.

"I probably could be telling you to look after Rochelle and Coach, but hell I think they should be taking care of you," Nick chuckled. "Without me you're going to be in lot of trouble the first minute you step out of this safe room." Nick's face softened further as Ellis choked on a sob. "But that's a lie. I know you'll be fine because you can't die. Your not going to let this get you down, you can't let me the guy everybody hates make you loose your spirit."

"I don't hate you, Nick," Ellis said quickly. "We don't hate you!" He hiccupped again, voice fading. "I could never hate you brother…"

Tears pricked Nick's eyes. He felt light headed and nauseous, from emotion and blood loss. He brought Ellis's face in and their first and last kiss was as sweet as heaven and as close as Nick was ever going to get. At least lady luck couldn't rob him of that. Nick leaned his forehead against Ellis's, smiling a moment of silence. "I got one more favor to ask of you Ellis," he said finally. He pulled the pistol from Ellis's belt loop and put it in the kid's hand.

Ellis shook his head. "No, no I won't."

"It's either that or I bleed out, and I'd rather it be quick." Nick sighed as he smiled. "If you could make it a headshot that would be great, just in case…you know…" He didn't want to even think about it. For all his luck he'd become a boomer. He watched as Ellis shook his head. Nick brushed back tears from the Ellis's face. "I want you to be the one to do it Ellis. Not because I want you to suffer but because you are the one I trust the most. I trust you to be strong and I trust you to do this right." Tears trickled down Nick's face as his smile wavered slightly. "I love you Ellis and I trust you." It was the hardest thing he ever had to say and he could see the final connection in those baby blue eyes. Nick could barely register Rochelle and Coach kneeling down next to him. All he could focus on was the crying eyes of the young man in front of him.

"Dear lord," Coach began, "please take our friend…our brother, Nick, into your arms. Let him experience your beautiful heaven and let him be at peace after all of this fighting. Let him be at peace and let us carry him within our hearts until we may join him." The big man's voice wavered through the tears. "Amen."

"Amen," Rochelle echoed.

"Amen," breathed Nick.

Ellis said nothing.

Nick really hoped that this didn't kill the kid's spirit. It was the last thing in the world he wanted to do. He tried to look at Ellis but the truckers hat was pulled down shielding his face. It was disappointing but Nick felt the cool metal of the pistol pressed against his forehead. He smiled and closed his eyes. "Amen," he breathed again as he felt Ellis's fingers thread through his own.


	3. AU: An Afternoon at Whispering Oaks

Nick really did hate clowns. Actually he loathed them, completely and utterly. Why anyone found them joyful and comical was beyond him. And of course there seemed to be quiet an abundance of the fucking demons of the seventh circle of hell here at the fair grounds. Their painted faces were even more frightening then that stupid peanut that was even more abundant then the painted face freaks. Nick watched as one clown danced for a group of children not far from there he stood leaning against a fence. He watched as the clown twirled in a circle, blew up a balloon, and then turned it into a hat to place on a little girl's head. Then the clown laughed like a psychopath and Nick so wished he had a shot gun at that moment or maybe a bazooka.

"Look what I won."

Nick's face remained unemotional even as the gnome was put directly in his line of sight. The happy face of the little red hated man was clearly mocking him. "Either get that thing out of my face or I swear I'm going to take a lighter to it."

Rochelle sighed as she pulled her gnome in close, looking at Nick with eyebrow slightly raised. "Your not having any fun are you?"

"Wow, you must be some kind of fucking mind reader," Nick said, rolling his eyes. Usually he found Rochelle the less annoying of the bunch given her intelligence level but it seemed the instant they stepped in to Satan's playground she had become as obnoxious as the other two. "Why am I here again?"

"Because Ellis asked you," Rochelle answered, a small smile growing on her face.

"No, that's not it," Nick said, closing his eyes in thought, "at least not that alone anyway. The kid is far from being that persuasive."

"Even when he's giving you a blow job?" Rochelle asked with a chuckle.

Fuck, how the hell did she know? Well, what did Nick expect with Ellis's mouth always running? Nick cursed inwardly as he remembered the scene. This idea of visiting Whispering Oaks had come up before but Nick had made sure to shoot it down every time, that was until Ellis started giving him the blow job of a life time and then refused to continue until Nick finally had to give in. It was either that or get blue balls because nothing would be able to relieve his cock better then overalls perfect little mouth. Nick groaned as he brought his hands up to his temples and began to stroke. All this happy music was giving him a migraine.

"Can't you drop your bad ass persona for just a minute and enjoy yourself?" Rochelle asked moving to lean against the fence as well.

"I am a full grown adult male," Nick stated. "How the hell would any man in his right mind be able to enjoy himself here?"

"How about getting in touch with your inner child?" Rochelle suggested.

"My inner child is locked up in juvie. He's got four to six for taking a bat to a clown, which is what I'm going to do in five seconds if I don't get out of here." Nick opened his eyes as he heard what sounded like a wild animal ripping into a carcass. He turned to see Coach approaching with every snack food available in the whole park. Nick raised an eyebrow. "Don't you think you should slow down there big guy? At this rate you'll probably die of diabetes or choke on a piece of pretzel."

"Trust me Nick," Coach said, after practically inhaling a fried doughnut, "this kind of eating hasn't ever effected me before."

"Well except for possibly keeping you from ever having a love life," Nick chuckled. "Then again I'm sure that there are plenty of whales in the sea." Nick didn't even care as Rochelle gave him a sharp punch in the shoulder. He looked to the left and could see people filing out of rollercoaster, including Ellis who had a wide grin on his face. "Oh fuck, here come the hillbilly."

"That was one of the most awesome rides ever!" the kid said as he finally rejoined them. "There was this one turn where it felt like we were all goin' to come off the track but we didn't and then it went down in this sheer drop! I'm tell ya man, that was so freakin' awesome! I know Keith is going to be jealous when he hears about this."

"Hey Ellis, hillbilly hick says what," Nick said with amusement.

Ellis blinked in confusion. "What?"

As Rochelle punched Nick in the shoulder once again, Coach looked around. "Seems we done everything in the park. Ellis has been on every ride, Rochelle has played most of the games, and I've got a chance to sample all of the snacks."

"Great, does that mean we can leave?" Nick begged.

"But you haven't done anything yet Nick," Ellis stated, his lower lip jutting out just a bit. "All you've done is follow us all around and complain."

"And you were expecting me to do something else?" Nick asked.

"I expected ya to do at least somethin'," Ellis answered. "Ya can't come to Whisperin' Oaks and just stand around."

"You wanna watch me?"

"I ain't leavin' until you go on a ride with me," Ellis said, looking Nick directly in the eye. "One ride or I ain't leavin'."

What was it about this place that made people turn into freaking two year olds? Nick sighed deeply looking at Ellis's determined face. "One ride and then we can go home and you never EVER ask me to step place in this hellish place again?"

Ellis nodded.

Nick sighed again. "Fine, but I refuse to go on that rollercoaster and anything that plays that stupid kiddy music."

"Well, there is one ride Ellis hasn't been on yet," Rochelle said glancing over to the side. All three of the men looked where she just happened to be looking and Coach roared with laughter.

"Oh hell no!" Nick said shaking his head. "Didn't I just say no rides with kiddy music?"

"Well to be fair, Nick, it's not really kiddy music," Ellis offered, looking pretty unsure himself. "But that's not a ride; it's the place ya take your girlfriend to make out…"

Nick glared at him but figured it was useless. The kid was determined to ride every ride in the park and Nick needed to get this over with. He grabbed Ellis by the wrist and grumbled a 'Come On' as he near dragged a stumbling Ellis into the tunnel of love. Coach's laughter following them every step of the way.

…

Nick wondered if it was a bad idea to go for a ride in the Tunnel of Love with a man down south. He was sure he was getting the stink eye from a couple of rednecks as he and Ellis piled into the plastic swan. Still at least the entire ride was in the dark, well if you ignored the fake pink mood lighting. The music was muffled from those bad speakers so that was a plus. Now if only this ride could be super short and then Nick's wish list would be complete. Of course as he glanced over to Ellis he could see, even in the low lighting, that the kid clearly wasn't having any fun. "What's wrong overalls? I thought you liked rides."

"The tunnel of love isn't a ride Nick," Ellis muttered, not looking at the gambler. "And your not havin' any fun so why should I?"

Good god! Why was Ellis the only person to make Nick feel guilty even after years of honing his 'I don't give a shit' out look on life. Nick had always tried to look out for himself and yet he had the feeling that he should at least try to explain himself. "I don't enjoy this kind of stuff," he admitted. "Carnivals, rides, and clowns are not my idea of a good time Ellis. I'm not from around here, I'm not…"

"Normal?" Ellis asked, receiving a slight glare. The kid sighed. "I know ya didn't have a happy childhood Nick…"

Nick's father had been locked up for life and his mother had been a stripper. Yeah, not exactly days filled with sunshine and cookies.

"…But I just wanted ya to experience life outside of busting people's skulls in and playin' poker. There is a life outside all that shadowy stuff and ya should try to enjoy it." Ellis sighed again. "Plus I kinda wanted this to be like our first date, the first time we get to go out together."

Nick probably should have corrected Ellis about the situation surrounding their relationship and the fact that they were not going to 'date', but he didn't. He didn't feel like correcting the kid after already depressing the kid enough for one day. Suddenly their swan came to a sudden stop and the lights and music flickered and then died. "Shit," Nick cursed softly.

"Ladies and gentlemen," a booming voice said over the speakers, "we are currently experiencing technical difficulties. Please remain in your seats and we will begin again momentarily."

Nick glanced over to the seat the man seated next to him. Although it was dark he knew the kid still had that depressed look on his face, the one that was causing Nick endless feelings of guilt. He knew exactly what he had to do and for the first time that day he was actually going to enjoy something. He moved closer to Ellis, wrapped an arm around the younger man's mid section and pulled Ellis closer.

"Nick what are you…" Ellis began before Nick's lips slipped onto his, silencing him with great efficiency. No matter what anyone said, Ellis could never deny that Nick wasn't a great kisser. He left Ellis gasping as Nick pulled away, smirking.

"You did say that the tunnel of love was for making out with your girlfriend. Why break with tradition?"

"I'm not a girl Nick."

"You're my girl, Ellis," Nick said as he pulled the kid into another kiss.

For some crazy reason Ellis kind of found that idea endearing. At least he got Nick to admit that they were together in this crazy relationship. Ellis smiled as the current kiss continued. But soon gasped as he felt a hand slip unbutton and then slip underneath his overalls. "Nick, this is going kind of beyond making out now ya know!"

Nick smirked. "You say tomato…"


End file.
